


The Only Truth that Matters

by spookyawards_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst, Episode: s08e14 This is Not Happening, F/M, Romance, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-12-13
Updated: 2005-12-13
Packaged: 2019-04-28 04:00:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14440977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spookyawards_archivist/pseuds/spookyawards_archivist
Summary: This is a short look into what Scully might have been thinking in the days and months following the events of This is Not Happening and before DeadAlive.  Written Momento Mori journal style.





	The Only Truth that Matters

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Spooky Awards](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Spooky_Awards), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [SpookyAwards' collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/spookyawards/profile).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** Mulder and Scully still belong to 1013 and FOX. I like to think of them as someone else's children - cute and fun to play with for a while, until I decide to send them back when I don't want to deal with the responsibility anymore.

  
Author's notes: Mulder and Scully still belong to 1013 and FOX. I like to think of them as someone else's children - cute and fun to play with for a while, until I decide to send them back when I don't want to deal with the responsibility anymore.   


* * *

The Only Truth that Matters  
By Chariot 

You are gone and I am lost. Nothing can save me from this earth-shattering truth. You once told me that the truth would save us and I wish you had been right. Unfortunately, we have both been lost to its quest, and as I carry the weight of this truth, I realize that I do not want to know it anymore. Anything I uncover from here on out means nothing if you are not around to share in it with me. Yes, I will carry on your work that over the years has also become mine, but I cannot promise to persist with the same passion as before. My fire died with you on that cold, unyielding forest floor. 

I will, however, continue to write to you, as I did when I had my cancer. I find it comforting to think that you may still know my thoughts even when you are forevermore beyond my physical reach. Any link to you that I can find to hold on to these days means a stronger chain I can use to rein in my sanity. 

In reality, your death has made me physically sicker than anything I went through during my cancer treatment, and it is only the piece of you that I carry inside of me that has allowed me to keep living. The promise of once more looking into your eyes when I have this child is what keeps me walking around. Without it I would have surely come to join you by now. I hope you understand my delay. 

Our child just moved and it takes my breath away every time. It is joy and anguish mixed together. It is feeling the undying love for a being I have yet to meet and the unending pain of knowing the love it will never get to know from you. If I do nothing else with my life, I promise to raise our child to know you and to know how much you loved it, even though you never knew. The stories our child will get to hear. You will be a hero in the grandest adventure ever told and a legend in our house. Don't worry, I will leave out the fluke-worm thing and the times you screamed like a girl. 

If I can give this child even just a fraction of the good memories and love that you have given me, I think we will be alright. I just pray that wherever you are you can keep an eye on us because I know that I cannot do this alone. I will need to look to you in the starlight for advice and reassurance of how to keep your spirit alive as I become both mother and father. 

I don't care what anyone says, nothing I have experienced at the FBI or in the X-Files has prepared me for this new journey I am embarking on; the only one in which I will not have a partner to watch my back. I am prepared for it to be hard, but I am also prepared for it to be one of the most amazing things I will ever accomplish. It will be in good company among my other cherished achievements of earning your trust and receiving your love. 

In all honesty, I did not need science to tell me the minute I had lost you forever, and I do not need scientific evidence to tell me that we have a partnership that spans the constraints of time and space that now keep us apart. Our love, trust and strong bond are everlasting forces that will not be broken, and I only need to close my eyes and feel how you are with me still to know it to be true. 

It is now the only truth that matters. I think, in a way, it always was. 

Fin. 

Thanks for reading! I always love feedback so please feel free to email me. 

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Title: **The Only Truth that Matters**  
Author: Chariot  
Details: 3k  ·  G  ·  Standalone  ·  12/13/05  ·   Email/Website      
Gossamer Category(Keywords): Vignette   [Romance, Angst]     
Characters: Mulder and Scully     
Pairings: Mulder/Scully romance   
SPOILERS: This is Not Happening   
SUMMARY: This is a short look into what Scully might have been thinking in the days and months following the events of This is Not Happening and before DeadAlive. Written Momento Mori journal style. 


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